Archive for July, 2011

SNL – I get my Irish flag

Posted: July 31, 2011 in lays

Last night, I almost didn’t go out.  My muscles are hella sore from the workout I did on Friday and my lower back, parts of my abs, hamstrings, and quads are still recovering.  I slept a ton and ate and that was it.  But finally at about 10, I text M to see what he’s up to.  He’s in the LES doing street game with some other guys so I decide to join in.

I get there, and we roam around for a good few hours.  I hook in this one blonde girl sitting down and we start talking, I went in indirect and just chatted about bars. She wanted to listen to music on her iphone and I went with it.  So we listen to music for about 10 minutes and then I just give her my phone to punch in after getting to know a few basics about her.  It was a sloppy number close.   The good thing is that M saw the whole thing and critiqued it and said that I gave into her frame instead of going with my own conversational topics.  Point taken.

I approach more black girls than usual because there were some cute ones out.  One was on a date but the other two hooked.

There was nothing else really notable about that few hours of street game for me personally.   I was just mainly out of my comfort zone, even though I should be semi-comfortable with street game since I’ve done it more often.  One of M’s protege’s went into this group where there was one girl and two guys and he put his arm around her.  One of the guys is even looking at him pissed off but he stays in with his arm around her.  He didn’t get anywhere with the girl, but it was just a ballsy approach.

We do a few more approaches, and then I end up going back to my favorite bar.  I go in and order a drink and take a quick survey of the landscape.  There’s two cute girls that are in the corner near me.  I see this old guy with the longest dreads I’ve seen in awhile get blown out by this very cute girl who is with another very cute girl.  I open by just pointing out how her body language said “get away from me” but her friend is more interested and her friend is local (one is visiting from DC, the other lives in Queens).  We then go into this conversation about the whole bar scene and survey the room to talk about who is hooking up and who is not.  I have to break it down that just because they are making out doesn’t mean they are hooking up.  If these two girls saw me last night with the Swiss chick, they would have assumed I was hooking up but I wasn’t.  M comes in to talk to the one visiting from DC.  I tell my girl that I wouldn’t mind seeing her another day.  The conversation pretty much stalls out after that and she leaves.

I go into another set immediately and “save” them from some guy that’s been bothering them all night.  I just tell both of them to start dancing with me so I stick my butt in one girl’s face and then dance with the other.  I honestly don’t remember what we talked about but I number close one of them.  She was the least attractive of the two.

I direct approach this tall brunette a bit later, and we just chat for awhile.  I find out pretty quickly that she’s from Ireland and we talk about accents.  I go for the isolation, asking if she smokes and she says she smokes when she’s drunk.  Perfect.  More small talk outside, telling her a little bit about me.  I go for the peck on the lips at first, it’s good.  After we’re done with our cigarettes, we start making out.  I tell her at first to just come towards my place after she gets rid of her friends and give her my address.  She’s like “OK” but I already know how that’s going to go.  We stayed outside because the bar was closing and her two friends were still in there.   I get introduced to the friends and they want to go eat.  I am like, “I’m hungry too” and go along with them.  Luckily, it ends up being me and the Irish girl walking and her two friends (one male, one female) walking behind us a bit.  We go up near my place and pass it, uh oh.  The one guy is feverishly looking for pizza or anything open and still wants to drink.  So by the time we get near her place, they separate to go look for food.  The Irish girl isn’t really hungry so it’s just me and the Irish girl walking towards her place.  Excellent.

We get there, make out on the elevator because the sexual tension to me was dying off, and get to her room.  She gets me a glass of water.  We eventually just do a ton of foreplay and I pull the condom out from my wallet.  I put it  in, just kind of half-assing it because I was kinda sore and tired at this point (like 5am).  I come and we just talk a bit.  I wake up around noon and walk back to my place.   She’s leaving for Ireland for 5 weeks so I’ll see how this develops.

What was KEY in this scenario..was that I was just very nice and cordial with her two friends and let them fizzle out.  I didn’t even think it was going to go down at one point, especially after we were right on my block looking for an open bar.  And another thing was that I acted as if I was hungry too around the friends, to provide some cover as to why I’m with them.   But I think the guy that was with us helped too, separating the other girl as we were walking.  Another thing is that the Irish girl and the female friend had a quick “girl chat” on the street and I just didn’t pay it any mind and talked to the guy.

wing philosophy taking shape

Posted: July 28, 2011 in the game

Here’s the mentality that I subscribe to totally when it comes to wings, I do it every once in awhile. I mean..especially when you’re out with a guy and you two look totally different in appearance, one guy might be so “in there” and then the other wing comes and the girls aren’t attracted to him at all and it kills the interaction.
I’ve had it happen in situations where I’ve introduced and really hyped up the guy, and even where I’ve tried to get a random “wingman” at the club in the set, thinking he’ll be cool. Girls may even not want to move with you because they fear that their friend will be “stuck” with your friend.

There’s such a small percentage of random girls that will hook and be attracted to the random two guys that just happen to approach them.

http://www.cliffslist.com/letter/give-wings-a-chance

http://krauserpua.com/2011/07/24/the-rat-pack-life-wing-rules-in-set/

Hardly anybody I’ve been out with  follows the common sense rules that Krauser so eloquently stated.

http://www.cliffslist.com/letter/aaron-sleazy-your-wingman-is-nothing-but-trouble

Bottom feeders too, guys who don’t approach whatsoever and who will leech off of your approaches are trouble too.  A ‘normal’ friend of mine (normal meaning someone not acquainted with all of the game literature out there) did that most of the time we were out.

And I’ve been in situations where I was “taking one for the team”…fuck that shit.  I don’t go out and get dressed up to fuck with some fat chick.  No real FRIEND would ask you to hang out with some fat chick while you try and score with the cute one.

The Weekend

Posted: July 27, 2011 in Field Reports

The.Weekend.Sucked.

Did a lot of street approaching with M on Friday night after going to a bar that I was hyped about and being rather disappointed by it.  Later on, Kickbomber joined us.  I actually had a girl get mad at me for doing my “Herd…Hot Nerd” opener to her.  She took off her glasses because she didn’t want to be perceived as that.  Hilarious.  I’ve never had that happen.  Later on, she started insulting me.  I left.

The other notable approach that night was this kinda thick chick at NMP at about 2am.  I was just sitting there with Kickbomber and observing shit.  I was telling him how the one black guy in this large group wasn’t hooking with the thick girl.  I opened her about the situation and she hooks in, instant touching, and the like.  She wanted to dance at first but I didn’t really want to.  I was already sweaty and just wanted to chill so we talked.  I found out she was from NC, and she actually asked “Are you a Christian?” and was complaining about the guys in NYC.  Her ultra entitlement mentality turned me off.  She was in a group with this one Jersey Shore looking dude who was dominating stuff and I found out that they all work at the same law firm.  I saw him making out with the cute one in the group and he would occasionally dance with the thick girl.  I grabbed her and started dancing with her after awhile and she goes back to her group a few times.  I honestly think in retrospect that she was gunning for the Jersey Shore guy but he was already totally locked in with the other girl.  I get her number sometime, I don’t even know why. Later on, while we’re outside, I meet her other co-workers and she’s all freaking out about where Jersey Shore and the girl went.   I thought she was just jealous of the two of them getting together and wanted to break it up.  She cops an attitude with me, I forgot why.  I cop an attitude because I just wasn’t in the mood to deal with a flaky girl who is probably like a 5 on my scale.  She met the minimum threshold for a one night stand, but that’s it.  Eventually it ends, and I just go home.

Saturday, I met up with Jon, a guy I met on the practicalpickup forums.  We go to this bar I’ve never been to.  I hook my first set, this Italian girl and her friend just by going direct on both of them.  Jon joins in a bit later, but his girl leaves after awhile, leaving me and my girl.  The dynamic was pretty crappy, with me standing up and her sitting down at the bar.  And honestly, I was kind of bored.  But after about 20 minutes, I tell her that we’re going downstairs and invite her and she declines.  I ask for a date and she says that she’s “seeing somebody”.  Set to nowhere.

Later on, we meet up with Geo at NMP.  We all are hooking absolutely nothing.  We then go to try our luck at some streetgame in the ludlow area.  Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

One thing about this weekend that I can learn from is that I don’t like going out with more than one wing.  Two wings are just too many agendas going at the same time. And the vibe just totally has to be about fun & women, nothing else.   Also, I think I’m just going to start working on my street gaming the way M does.  Anyway, got an internet date tomorrow provided that I don’t have to work extra hours.

Thursday night with M

Posted: July 22, 2011 in Field Reports

Went out with M kinda late.  I went to the gym and met up with him around 10:30 or so

We go around the Ludlow area and do some street approaches.  Nothing is really hooking for either of us.  I told him, “it’s too fucking hot NOT to go direct, so that’s what I’m doing”.   The one girl I hooked into a 20 minute conversation said something like “I don’t date” or something.

We bounce to a taco place and M talks to this girl sitting by herself.  For me, this was a learning opportunity because I realized he wasn’t doing anything THAT special, just comfort building and asking shit like  “what kind of music do you like?” It’s the little things though, like touching that I saw him do.   His escalation is gradual, and that’s what I’m going to start doing instead of trying to force make outs and stuff.   Being that M and I are both black, and both game white girls, comfort game has to be good.   But context is important too, he doesn’t game in clubs at all.  Nightclubs are generally full of ADD girls, there’s more of an urgency to get physical faster or they are going to quickly leave, especially if there’s a ton of other options for them in the club.  Regardless of that,  I’ve definitely gotta start doing more random approaches on the street or in stores, there’s just so much potential there that I’m not tapping into.

Anyway, he bounces her and I follow along to 2a.  I run out to the ATM to get some money and then talk to the bouncer for a sec.  I see this cute girl smoking a weird cigarette so I bum one off of her and we talk for awhile.  I thought she was alone but her date came outside and we talked about all sorts of random shit for a sec.  I go back in, go upstairs where M and his girl are sitting and order a drink.  About 2 minutes later, he’s bouncing her to his house.

I meet some random guys in the bar and try to get them to go to Lit with me.  They are from out of town but they don’t really follow me.

Feeling Good

Posted: July 21, 2011 in inner game, lifestyle, relationships

Reflecting on my 30th birthday BBQ last Friday does kind of make me warm and fuzzy inside.

The reason is that I think about how far I’ve come in the last two years since I discovered the whole seduction scene.   I think after I came back from Austria in late ’06, a certain part of me just shut off socially.   My interests and hobbies were different.  I thought about my ex-girlfriend that I left over there a lot.  My old friends moved away.  I just wasn’t into hanging out with any of them, which I now regret.  I stayed in an apartment with this weirdo in VA until I moved to NJ and lived with my parents.  I got fired from two jobs and laid off from one of them.  I was a mess.

I just didn’t really want anything but to get on track in terms of my career.   And by the time that I found a steady job that I liked, I just told myself that it’s time to get social and get some new people to hang out with.   And time to actually stick my dick in some vagina again.  Sometime between the layoff and actually starting a career, I saw this video  (an edited version of the original, which I know runs over 10 minutes) which lit a fire in my butt.  I had been sitting around, gaining weight, not doing shit but being depressed and here’s a guy who approached a stranger on the street and made out with her.  I downloaded everything I could find and found myself in Brad P’s 30/30 club.  Met a few local guys in the scene at I was out trying to get  again after maybe three years of not doing anything.

Now I’ve worked hard enough to live in a cool neighborhood, have two job offers pending to make more money, and life couldn’t get any better.  I’ve got a fuckbuddy but no strong emotional bond with her but that’s OK.  At least she’s funny.  I’ve got friends calling me up to do stuff, and I’m out gaming all the time on the weekends and sometimes during my day-to-day activities.   I still want to get in better shape and explore my hobbies, but that’s all a work in progress.   Everybody at my party, I’ve met in 2010-11.  So that’s not a long time and tells me that there’s more where that came from if I keep doing what I’m doing.  Of course, most of my invitees were men and my buddy M provided a lot of the ladies there, but who cares?  I liked my role of being sort of a ‘connector’ to people, and that’s only going to continue.  Me and M have plans to keep doing rooftop parties, keep connecting people, keep bringing value to others instead of always trying to operate in that nightgame/daygame paradigm where the odds are always stacked against you anyway.

My neediness still seeps through in my interactions, but I think part of the cure is just building that solid foundation of building a lifestyle that I can say I’m proud of.

rooftop adventures

Posted: July 17, 2011 in Field Reports

So I finally get to a rooftop bar this summer.   I roll with Greek and we first try to get into this one rooftop bar he was telling me about that is supposedly really good.  We fail.  We then go to a place I’ve frequented since I started gaming.

We get in, and it’s not even 10pm but it’s crowded enough.  We sit around and talk by the bar for a bit.  I notice this really tall blonde girl, gorgeous coming near me.  She’s asking to get near the bar so I give her space.  I do my ol “And I’ll have a rum and coke please” and it works.  We get into a conversation for a little bit but she’s buying drinks for her 4 friends.  I agree, to my detriment, to get her the next time.  So time passes as I’m talking to other people and she spots me and I do end up getting her a drink.  Me and her four friends go outside to smoke and I find out that she’s married and so are the people she’s with.  They were just visiting from Ohio and are easily in that 40+ range.  After awhile, I just know it’s not going anywhere so I just bounce.

There were  a few sets to nowhere including this Irish group of friends.  But me and Greek do stumble upon three doctors.  I’m flirting with two of them and he’s flirting with the  other one.  I finally just take out my phone for the two girls and tell them to key their number in.

Besides that, it was a rather underwhelming night for both of us.   There was a Canadian girl who I grinded with, kissed her neck and all but her friend was standing right there and cockblocked at first.   Greek goes in to handle her but in retrospect, I should have handled her to make her more comfortable with me dancing really sexually with her friend.

I barely remember most of the conversations, some were so short they are not even worth writing about.

Thurs and Fri

Posted: July 16, 2011 in Field Reports

Where to start…

Well, I had my best friend in town, and we hung out Thursday night in BK.  I went back to the same hipster dive bar I discovered last week as well as Brooklyn Bowl.  First off, every Thursday I might make it a habit to go out to Brooklyn Bowl.  Questlove was DJ’ing and I loved the vibe there.

Before we even get to the place, we hook a group of 3 black girls.  The vibe is going good between me and the one I was with, so it looked good.  I bailed out early though, I wasn’t really feeling them.

I hooked this tall really sexy black girl that I regret not going after and reopening a bit later.

There were random groups that hooked throughout the night: group of Japanese people, two Polish girls, and a few others, but that was it.

Friday was my party.  So I was kind of stressed out from the long day.  The good news is that it was a success.  It was definitely popping by 12am.  Also, the Bulgarian came through and bought wine.  It was a nice mix of people I go out with, work with, and have known for a long time.   There were a few opportunities to game, but I honestly was in this whole ‘being a connector’ kind of mode where I was just introducing people and stuff.

Only thing I was disappointed in is that it peaked too early.  It was probably officially dead at like 1:30AM and people wanted to go other places.  So me and my best friend do a quick clean up and head to one of my local bars.

I get in, see a girl with short hair and try to talk to her.  She blows me off.  The good thing though was that there were a group of two Greek girls that were fun.  Me and my best friend end up dancing and hanging with them the whole night.  I get a kiss at the end, nothing else though.  I could tell she was turned on when we were dancing with each other though.  I missed the opportunity to either get really sexual or blown out.

Was out with Rex and a couple of his friends.  A friend of his knew of a pretty good bar in WilliamsBurg so we went.  I get in and am amazed at the quality of women there.  In the city, sometimes you’ve got to deal with the ugly fat friend but in this particular hipster bar, that just didn’t exist.  The friends were more than ok most of the time.

First group of the night was two girls, one German and one Asian.  I lock in pretty well with the German but my friend doesn’t really feel any attraction for the Asian girl.  I cold read the German perfectly, do some role playing, and it seems like it’s going pretty well.  The Asian girl is getting chatted up by some Italian guy and she tells the German girl, “he’s from Italy”.  What ends up fucking it up is that I wasn’t engaging her anymore at that point and my wing was talking to her.  I end up standing near the Asian girl so we end up chatting.  The German girl’s body language is really stating the obvious that she was into this Italian dude so I don’t bother with her anymore.

There were a few short sets here and there, no major blowouts because girls at this bar seem kind of open to being flirted with.  I think I was “on” though, just coming up with random flirty shit to say.

I’m standing around and some short brunette girl takes a look at me so obviously so I just stick my hand out.  She hooks well.  What fucked it up is my friend creeped her friend out and I could tell.  They both liked me, I number close one of them.  The winging shit of pickup is so messed up because guys assume that they can or should wing in every situation.

I go into the main area and see this really good looking two set of girls.  One I open direct with, it hooks really nicely.  I think it hooked well because I was really HONEST, the girl was banging.  The other girl is attractive as well, and takes more of an interest in me.  We’re dancing a little bit and we’re doing this thing.  She excitedly jumps on me screaming “its my birthday!” and I lift her up like three times.  I end up messing up, getting too serious commenting about how I don’t like high 5’s or something.  It was all positive and I turned it all negative.  She goes back to her friend.  I re-enter a bit later to no avail.  What she told me during that was that she was driving, I should have asked for a ride back to my place.  Also, she could have used more aggression on my part.  I went for the kiss, no-go.  I should have went for the neck.

We go to this rave and just have a ball.  First off, I’ve never raved before and I figured out how to do it easily. You just jump up a lot, there’s no rhythm to it at all.  The first girl I approach is this Asian girl who actually kisses me on the lips before she ‘gets back to her friends’.   I try to approach her later but I couldn’t get anything going.

The only thing that hooked was this Finnish girl who was playing with the hula hoops.  I think I open her saying that I can hula hoop better than her.  So I play with it and obviously don’t know what I’m doing, but she gets a laugh at it.  Right away, instant kino and eye contact.  We build up some rapport but then she goes for her glow sticks like she wants to play with them more than she wants to talk to me.  I just start kissing her neck and she starts kissing back.  She stops, says something like “I don’t really know you” or whatever so I leave.  I try to talk dirty to her but that doesn’t work either.

We ended up leaving at 7am and all basically were struggling to stay awake on the train.  I had an awesome time, discovered a bar I will frequent in Williamsburg, and raved for the first time.

Out with kickbomber on Friday.  We were just at the same place the same night.  I think my night went…ok.  I guess my expectations are way up since I’ve been having things happen so easily lately.  But the  two highlights were two girls who could barely understand me.  And between these two girls, there were some rejections.

One was this Swiss girl.  I approached and got her to dance with me.  I then isolated her to smoke together.  What ended up happening is that we went to sit down, I was going for the kiss and getting rejected.  Some German guy interrupts and basically controls it.  I was honestly getting sick of her and didn’t like her that much so I got up and left.  I tried to re-enter later to bum a cigarette off of her but that didn’t work.  Oh well.

Another was this Finish girl.  I approached on the dance floor but noticed that she was rejecting guys left and right who would just assume she wanted to dance.  But I noticed she wasn’t a good dancer anyway so I just said something to her.  I then told her that I couldn’t hear her so we needed to sit down.  So we sit down for awhile, get up go dance, and her friend she came with is sticking her tounge down some guys’s throat.  I couldn’t really get her to follow me upstairs because she didn’t want to leave her friend.  After awhile, I got annoyed with it even though we ended up making out later.  I make the conversation kind of sexual, and I hear from her something alluding to the fact that she’s not down to go any further than just kissing.  I leave.  She was annoying me because we couldn’t understand each other most of the time.

Foreign girls are overrated.  And tonight, I’m going to work consciously on my vocal tonality and projecting it from the chest.

ONS with crazy-Canadian

Posted: July 7, 2011 in lays
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So it’s Wednesday night and I was feeling a bit ansty.  I text kickbomber to see what he’s up to and he’s rolling to his Wednesday night spot.  I hop on the train and meet up with him.

When we get in, I see this black guy making out with this white chick and I was like “hmm..wonder if that’s a cold approach or that they know each other”.  I make note of it.  I get some beers, and we’re just standing around scoping the place out.

I do a half hearted set and stick my hand out to this tall blonde girl.  No go.  I go into another set to open this blonde girl.  I could tell she wasn’t into me and was kind of creeped out.  Only thing to take note of here is that me and kickbomber were standing in one corner, I approach the girl from the other side and hesitate a bit.  It’s almost as if I startled her.

I go back to the bar and see the girl that was making out with the black guy by herself…or so it seems (I’ll call her Toronto for simplicity’s sake).  It’s pretty much instant attraction, as she leans besides me.  The problem is that she met some short Italian looking dude and he just bought her a drink.  I introduce myself to him, exchange pleasantries, and he grabs her to go to the dance floor.  As she’s walking away, she gives me this sarcastic look and I just wink at her because I know she liked me.

Then there was a huge set of Irish girls, about 10 of them.  One sort of hooks in, asking me about other bars.  She wanders off, then I get talking to some other girl who was yelling in my ear earlier and I told her to shut up.  She was a lot friendlier this time, but she wanders off.  It’s hard to entertain 10 people in a high octane club like that so I leave.

I’m looking back at Toronto and the Italian short dude, and they are close…the problem I saw immediately is that she was teasing him with kissing but she makes out with him anyhow.  Somehow, she ends up grinding on another guy right in front of him.  I then go ask the Italian dude if he bought her a drink.  He denies it, and I tell him that I already saw her making out with some other guy right before him.

He grabs her, and asks if this is true.  She’s too drunk to answer, and I just kind of give him that look like “you just fucked up now”.  But with asking that kind of question, he blew himself out and got emotional with the girl.  I just grab her and continue on.

Making out was easy.  My first attempted “let’s get out of here fails”.  I probably attempted a second time and that failed too.  I’m resisting her kiss attempts a little bit because I had already seen her make out with two guys.  She gets a little mad that she couldn’t get that validation from me and almost walks off.  I keep holding her hand though, and go for her neck.  She then yells excitedly, “you’re a stud!” I then just start talking dirty, telling her all the nasty shit I want to do to her.  Finally, I’m like “you need to cool off, let’s go downstairs”.  She finally follows me.

We don’t go downstairs, we go outside.  The Cab God was shining down upon me and there was a cab waiting right outside.  I just open the door and put her in there and off we go.

We get to my place, she gets out the cab and wanders around for a second.  I just grab her and we go inside.

She’s very drunk.  At this point she’s still asking me what my name is.  I start eating her out but I’m not even fully hard yet because I had all sorts of thoughts going through my mind like “Is this bitch gonna claim I raped her if she wakes up and doesn’t remember me?” So I went in, half erect and she stops me.  I then just try to slow down.  For about 2 hours the pattern is me telling her to go to sleep, her being all excitable and making out with me, me getting hard and fucking her a bit, her stopping before I can even get it really going.  And she was loud as hell, giggly, kind of ditz, and annoying.  I figured I needed more of an emotional connection so I just start getting more personal with her.   In hindsight, a better idea would have been to just stop all escalation, get her to go to sleep, wake up and try fucking her.

Maybe at about 3am, she’s finally opening up to me and telling me who she is.  I sort of understood why she was out doing the stuff she was doing.  She had a date tonight with a guy she had a crush on for two years.  She was confessing to him, crying her eyes out that this guy wanted nothing to do with her.  She was visiting NY from Toronto for 4 days, and I think that this guy was a big reason why she came.  So she ended up at the bar by herself just drinking the pain away and trying to get some validation.   Anyway, she finally leaves at around 4:30